Category: Lawyer Jokes

Here's your fee schedule


A lawyer calls his client to tell him about his fee schedule.
"Alright," the lawyer says looking through his papers. "You owe me $1000 down and $417. ... Read On »


Some last minute requests


A man woke up in a hospital bed and called for his doctor.
He asked, "Give it to me straight. How long have I got?"
The physician replied that he ... Read On »


Brain transplant


"How can I ever thank you?" gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubles.

"My dear woman," Darrow replied, "ever since ... Read On »


Lawyer's personal injury


A golfer hooked his tee shot over a hill and onto the next fairway. Walking toward his ball, he saw a man lying on the ground, groaning with pain.
"I ... Read On »


Lawyers on a flight


An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergen ... Read On »


How's business?


Two lawyers met at a cocktail party late one night.
"How's business?" asked the first.
"Rotten," replied the other.
"Yesterday, I chased an ambula ... Read On »


Lawyer's club


A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer's club by mistake.
The old legal lions gave them a fight for their life and their money. The gang was very hap ... Read On »


Is there a way to thank you?


"How can I ever thank you?" gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubles.
"My dear woman," Darrow replied, "ever since t ... Read On »


Who handles cases?


Nugent needed legal advice, so he walked into the office of Gregory, Ellis and Gregory. Nugent sat down at the desk of the senior member of the firm. ... Read On »


Get away with murder


Two prisoners are talking about their crimes:
George: "I robbed a bank, and they gave me 20 years"
Herman: "Hmm. I killed a man, and I'm here for 3 ... Read On »


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