Category: Funny Jokes


Dear Optimist, Pessimist and Realist,
While you guys were busy arguing about the glass of water I drank it.

the Opportunist

Do you like my new jacket?

Do you like my new jacket?
It's great. Shame your body doesn't suit it, though.

Never forget a face

I never forget a face!

But in your case I'll make an exception!

Pretty Little Head

She has a pretty little head.
For a head, it's pretty little.

Yesterday's coffee

She's like yesterday's coffee
-- a little weak in the bean.

Bone specialist

He should study to be a bone specialist
- he has the head for it.


You're so poor that when I went to your house I stepped on a match and your mom said,
"Oh! who turned off the fireplace"!!!

Whoa! Shut your mouth!!!

Your breath is so bad that when you talk your teeth duck.

You are so stupid...

You are so stupid that you flunked special-ed


I saw a garbage truck driving yesterday.
You never told me you were moving.