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A somewhat drunk man feels a bald man's head and says, "Say, your head feels just like my wife's ass." The bald man feels his own head and says with ... Read On »
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Two drunks walk into a bar. The first drunk looks at his buddy and says "I gotta go use the can." So he wonders off to the bathroom and is gone for ... Read On »
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A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I've got ... Read On »
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There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar. Suddenly the drunk stands up and yells, "ATTENTION ALL" and farts loudly. The wif ... Read On »
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A very drunk man in a bar tells the bartender and everyone that is sitting near him that he can fart out the tune to The Star Spangelled Banner! Ever ... Read On »
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A drunk staggered into a cemetery and fell into a freshly dug grave. Pretty soon a second drunk staggered by. "Get me out of here", said the one in ... Read On »
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"Old Jethro's next door's a-makin' moonshine again." the wife told her husband. "How can you tell ?" he asked. "Did you smell it ?" "Nope. But a b ... Read On »
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What's the difference between a drunk and an alcoholic?
A drunk doesn't have to go to those stupid meetings.
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A woman goes into a bar with a little Chihuahua dog on a leash. She sits down at the bar next to a drunk. The drunk rolls around, leans over, and spl ... Read On »
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Drunk walks into elevator, no elevator there, falls five stories down, lands on the bottom. Lies there a few seconds, slowly opens his eyes,and then s ... Read On »
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