Category: Comedian Jokes

Surgery


I had my appendix removed.
There was nothing wrong with it, I just did it as a warning to the other organs in my body to shape up or they're out of ... Read On »


HMO


My HMO is terrible. They charge me for a self-examination.
It's a flat fee. - Wendy Liebman


Gas Stations


Why do they lock gas station bathrooms?
Are they afraid someone will clean them?


Taxes


The IRS says they can't give back 80 million dollars in refunds because they don't have addresses for the taxpayers.
Yeah, they can't find you when ... Read On »


IRS


The IRS announced that obese Americans are entitled to certain tax breaks.
Apparently, under the new rules, you're allowed to claim two or more chin ... Read On »


Psychic Phenomena


Do you ever get the vuja day feeling?
Not deja vu.
This is vuja day:
the strange feeling that none of this has ever happened before-George Carli ... Read On »


Escalators


An escalator can never break; it can only become stairs.
You would never see an "Escalator temporarily out of order" sign, just "Escalator temporari ... Read On »


Environment


The EPA is conducting a $700,000 dollar study to see if Alaskan trees are polluting Oregon forests.
You can tell Republicans are in power.
"Pollut ... Read On »


Paddy


I knew this guy. He was a sound guy from Ireland.
He spoke to me one day and told me he was going to apply for a job.
He told me that he walked out ... Read On »


My Dog


Having a dog is great, it's just the 'dog people' that freak me out.
"Oh, look at her, she's precious,just like Mommy."
Me?!?
If I birthed somet ... Read On »


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