Oprectomy

Category: Medicine


Oprectomy

KENMORE HOSPITAL
61 COMMONWEALTH AVE.
BOSTON, MA. 02115
DATE:____________
NAME:
ADDRESS:

Please be advised that your Oprectomy operation is scheduled for_______________, at ___________(a.m.)(p.m.). The purpose of this extremely delicate operation is to sever the cord that connects your eyes to your rectum and hopefully get rid of your shitty outlook on life.

Sincerely,
J. Grabber, M.D.
Kenmore Hospital


A man walks into a doctor office


A man walks into a doctor's office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.
"What's the matter with me ... Read On »

A Short History of Medicine


I have an earache:
2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root.
1000 A.D. - That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer.
1850 A.D. - That prayer is superstitio ... Read On »

Oprectomy


Oprectomy

KENMORE HOSPITAL
61 COMMONWEALTH AVE.
BOSTON, MA. 02115 ... Read On »

Two gynecologists meet at lunch...


Two gynecologists meet at lunch.
The first one says, "I had a patient this morning witha clit like a dill pickle.
The second one says, "That big or ... Read On »

Give me the bad news first...


"give me the bad news first."
"You've got AIDS."
"Oh, no! What could be worse than that?"
"You've also got Alzheimer's Disease."
"Oh. Well, that' ... Read On »

What is red and sticky and crawls up a girls thigh?


What is red and sticky and crawls up a girls thigh?

A home-sick abortion.

There was a costume party at a mental hospital...


There was a costume party at a mental hospital; the theme of the party was "war".
The first person comes up onto the stage and says, "I'm an atomic ... Read On »

What is the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer?


What is the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer?

The taste.

What do you do when an epilectic takes a bath?


What do you do when an epileptic takes a bath?
Throw in your laundry.

A little change


The patient shook his doctor's hand in gratitude and said:
"Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But ... Read On »

123456
Oprectomy0/ 5.