Top Signs That You're Too Old to Trick or Treat ...

Category: Festival Jokes


10. You get winded from knocking on the door.
9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.
8. You ask for high fiber candy only.
7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.
6. People say, "What a scary mask!" but you're not wearing a mask!
5. When the door opens you yell, "Trick or..." and can't remember the rest.
4. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of restraining orders.
3. You have to carefully choose a costume that won't dislodge your hairpiece.
2. You're the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker. and last but not least...
1. You avoid going to houses where your ex-wives live. Happy Halloween!


I just had a dream about it


A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband,
"I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine' ... Read On »

I'm sending out some cards


A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink env ... Read On »

Do you go to church?


A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my frie ... Read On »

Top Signs That You're Too Old to Trick or Treat ...


10. You get winded from knocking on the door.
9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.
8. You ask for high fiber candy only.
7. ... Read On »

Geek's thanksgiving


1. Be thankful you haven't been spammed!
2. Be thankful your computer isn't down!
3. Be thankful your favorite forum isn't down!
4. Be thankful you ... Read On »

The blonde Thanksgiving dinner


It was the first time the blonde was eating Thanksgiving dinner without her family. Trying to re-enact the tradition, she prepared a dinner for hersel ... Read On »

The football-playing turkey


The pro football team had just finished their daily practice session when a large turkey came strutting onto the field. While the players gazed in ama ... Read On »

A man forgot to buy turkey for Thanksgiving


It's the day before Thanksgiving, and the butcher is just locking up when a man begins pounding on the front door.
"Please let me in," says the man d ... Read On »

Things proven to change the course of Thanksgiving


1. During the middle of the meal, turn to mom and say, "See mom, I told you they wouldn't notice that the turkey was four months past its expiration d ... Read On »

New Year Nerd Resolutions


NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO KEEP IF YOU'RE A NERD
16. I resolve... I resolve to... I resolve to, uh... I resolve to, uh, get my, e ... Read On »

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