Texan's guide to life

Category: Red Indian Jokes


Never squat with yer spurs on.
There's two theories to arguing with a woman; neither one works.
Don't worry about biting off more than you can chew, your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger than you think.
If you get to thinking you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else dog around.
Never smack a man who's chewing tobacco.
It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
Letting the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n putting it back in.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.


You are in trouble


An evil Atheist explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying the situation, he ... Read On »

Solve Indian puzzles


An Indian chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant. The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated he built her a teepee made of deer ... Read On »

Is that your horse?


The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar one day and sat down to drink a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said, "Who owns ... Read On »

Texan with a new car


Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse.
"I know that smart a leck Tex," said the first. "He's going to start bragging about that new foreig ... Read On »

Learn it by listening


Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground.
One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see that India ... Read On »

Stagecoach surprise


I had a dream the other night. I was in the old West riding in a stagecoach. Suddenly, a man riding a horse pulls up to the left side of the stagecoac ... Read On »

Had any accidents?


The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy. The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions.
"Ever have an accident?"
... Read On »

Texan's guide to life


Never squat with yer spurs on.
There's two theories to arguing with a woman; neither one works.
Don't worry about biting off more than you can che ... Read On »

Indians and Polish


There were two Indians and a Polish fellow walking along together in the desert, when, all of a sudden, one of the Indians took off and ran up a hill ... Read On »

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